Sometimes, you just need to see your thoughts on paper.

I'm barely eating these days.

Too much going on, my body doesn't tell me HEY STOP! WE NEED TO RELOAD.

As I type, it appears I have spent $13.95 at a buffet on mashed potatoes, macaroni and cheese, cottage cheese with mandarin oranges, salad, cauliflower with cheese sauce, scalloped apples and a pickle.

I am having moderate success- each bite is a challenge. Someone play airplane spoon with me.

Stress and crushes make my midsection look fantastic.


I worked last night with moderate success; since W left I am hard pressed for a new hustle buddy. It seems everyone is moving on.

I miss E more and more these days, but it appears her estranged abusive husband is back to stay and took away her phone, and L won't answer to give me updates.


I find myself lately in a position where I have to decide where my loyalties lie. People always open up to me, tell me things regardless of whether I ask or not, entrusting me with their indiscretions. I don't always agree, but after my years as a dancer to people who require discretion I am good at keeping my mouth shut.


When you feel pulled in one direction because you love a friend sosososo much, but in the other direction because Ijustdontdothat, what do you do?
It kept me up last night and I still don't have an answer.

Do you do this if the information you have could damage your friend?
Do you not do it because it's unethical?
If you don't protect your friend, does it make you awful?
But if you tell, does it make you a hypocrite?

I should however, tell my audience that there is no way that the person dishing the info would know who released it.
It isn't like she tells only me.
She tells most anyone who will listen.

So I suppose, even though their real name still sounds clunky in my mouth because I am not used to it, I will stand by my friend.

Sometimes I know the answer all along, and this blog is just a sounding board.